Y Tu Mamá También

As the days get hotter, I find myself walking more and more slowly. I may be burning fewer calories, but now I have time to read the numerous handwritten signs taped to shop doors and windows. This evening, as Adeet and I crept along Roosevelt Avenue, I stopped in front of a graphic "Before" and "After" photo display. And then I read the copy:

Why, Mother has the skin of a schoolgirl, thank you very much. If I did look older than Mom, I might pass for sixteen. I can only imagine how haggard you must appear, Miss Flawless Program, since your mother's complexion surely resembles a pair of rattlesnake cowboy boots.

When this heat wave breaks, I'll pick up my pace again. But I'll be sure to look out for any particularly impertinent signs. You don't expect me to let them talk about my mother that way, do you?